Asking enterprise capitalists for funding is a ceremony of passage for tech founders. This has led to a different common expertise: the VC pitching horror story. A massive conversation sharing such tales has taken place all week on X, with the feedback each humorous and infuriating. We learn via all of them to search out essentially the most attention-grabbing ones so that you don’t must.
Greg Isenberg, a startup podcaster, publication author, and founding father of Late Checkout Studio — a holding firm whose earlier ventures embody an organization acquired by WeWork — acquired the dialog began with a narrative a few VC falling asleep throughout a pitch assembly. Isenberg has a big following on X, and his publish clearly struck a nerve.
“I used to be as soon as pitching in a board room at a high 3 VC agency for a $15M Sequence A. 12 individuals within the assembly. One of many GPs absolutely fell asleep. Out chilly for 30+ minutes. No one acknowledged it. Everybody simply saved going,” he shared on X.
VCs sleeping via pitch conferences was far and away the commonest horror story shared. Not simply drowsing, however full on zonked.
Zynga founder Mark Pincus instructed his VC-asleep story. “I checked out my buddy who arrange the assembly and requested if i ought to preserve presenting and she or he stated sure. It was ‘weekend at bernies’ meets Silicon Valley,” he wrote.
Apparently, falling asleep didn’t imply the VC wouldn’t make investments. Multiple founders reported receiving time period sheets from companions who’d dozed off through the pitch.
“I as soon as pitched a partnership in 2015 for our Sequence A the place one companion (well-known Midas lister) fell asleep & one other couldn’t cease scowling. Obtained a name 2 hrs after the IC that they had been sending a time period sheet over,” wrote Liz Wessel. Wessel, who co-founded and offered HR startup WayUp and is now a companion at First Spherical Capital, stated her staff didn’t take the cash — and that the VC was shocked.
There have been so many tales about VCs sleeping that former a16z companion Arianna Simpson wrote, “Are VCs okay?? Narcolepsy seems to be operating rampant.”
There have been, after all, quite a lot of tales about VCs signing time period sheets then pulling out final minute, or ghosting, by no means wiring the cash. The much more galling half? A few of these VCs apparently went on to treat the founders like portfolio corporations anyway, asking for company updates or to serve as a reference. One founder stated the VC even wanted a share of the post-acquisition proceeds.
Travis Kalanick, the Uber co-founder famend for his willpower, told a story about discovering {that a} VC was making an attempt to ghost the assembly and depart the constructing. Kalanick stated he adopted the VC to his automobile and pitched from the passenger’s seat.
Not everybody had unhealthy experiences to report. Some founders stated they’ve by no means had something however great experiences with VCs, with just a few even sharing love stories about particular buyers. Sure, most VCs are hardworking, genuinely attempt to be useful, and don’t take naps throughout conferences. However poor experiences are so widespread that Pincus exclaimed, “I f*cking love this second, when founders not must be afraid to name out VCs for dumb conduct.”
Probably the most beautiful tales
Nonetheless, the tales that actually surprised had been the ones posted by Cloudflare founder Matthew Prince. “A Sequoia companion handed on Cloudflare as a result of he didn’t assume a lady could lead on a safety infrastructure firm,” Prince wrote. The girl in query is Cloudflare’s co-founder and COO Michelle Zatlyn. Provided that Cloudflare is now an $87 billion market cap firm, with anticipated annual income of $2.8 billion in 2026, the judgment hasn’t aged nicely.
Sequoia companion Shaun Maguire, no stranger to controversy over his remarks himself, replied that he’s at all times admired Zatlyn, and requested Prince to spill the title of the companion who stated that. Prince punted, “Possibly over a drink someday. However I wager you could have a superb guess already.”
However wait, Prince dished extra!
He told a narrative about distinguished investor Vinod Khosla, who supplied to speculate after which, based on Prince’s recollection, prompt that the founder “fireplace” his co-founders and take their inventory. “I feel the charitable learn was it was a check of my character. However I used to be so offended that we by no means spoke once more. Actually blocked his quantity.”
Prince was fast to add nuance about Khosla: “He’s extraordinarily good/intelligent. Has been an unimaginable investor — can’t argue together with his monitor report. Simply not the persona I’d select to work with.”
It’s price noting that recollections of conversations are likely to differ, and we don’t know what Khosla truly stated, meant, or remembers. However eyes popped at such open discuss one of many Valley’s most profitable, highly effective VCs. Many individuals referred to as Prince’s candor an example of having “FU” money. Prince, of course, is a billionaire as of late.
Not all of Prince’s tales solid VCs because the villains. Particularly, he thought he had lined up a easy meet-and-greet on a Monday with Marc Andreessen, the co-founder of enterprise agency a16z. As an alternative, Andreessen confirmed up together with his complete funding staff, able to be wowed. The ill-prepared Prince didn’t impress. “I framed the rejection letter they despatched,” he stated of the outcome. Others told similar stories of conferences with Andreessen and his agency.
Maybe the funniest story got here from Julie Fredrickson, a founder-turned-investor, who obtained a name from a VC affiliate earlier than arriving at a agency’s workplace — warning her a few rock formation seen exterior the window that, apparently unbeknownst to the buyers inside, was formed like male genitalia. “The agency will endlessly in my thoughts be Dickrock Ventures,” she wrote.
Whereas the Valley’s VCs acquired roasted most closely, founders shared incidents involving international VCs, too. Some VCs additionally dished about pitching to restricted companion buyers.
The threads are price studying not only for the laughs, however for what they reveal: The fundraising course of is opaque, the facility dynamic is actual, and the experiences that founders whisper about privately are much more widespread than the trade tends to acknowledge publicly.
Maybe Isenberg defined the ethical behind all of those tales finest. “When you’re elevating proper now, simply know: each founder has a narrative like this. The method is bizarre. The ability dynamic is bizarre,” he wrote.
A second lesson could also be: If Andreessen agrees to satisfy with you, he means enterprise.
Once you buy via hyperlinks in our articles, we may earn a small commission. This doesn’t have an effect on our editorial independence.
